I'VE JOINED AN ONLINE DATING WEBSITE.
And, you guys, I hate it. It's the worst. I just don't understand anything that is going on.
And that's not just the dating website... that's just in life, like in general, I have no idea what the fuck is going on ever.
So over the weekend I made my mom take some cheesecake photos of me because, other big announcement, I have lost 100 lbs, and I had zero photos of myself not looking like a zeppelin.
(Side note: I'll post a few of the photos later. There is one in particular that is a gem that I think I should share, but I forgot to email them to myself)
And, you guys, I don't know what I expected. I don't know if I have incredibly high standards, or if the pickins' are just super slim around these parts, but every guy that has contacted me seems like a serial killer, a broseph, or a total schmo. I mean, I realize this is real life and not an adorable romantic comedy starring Reese Witherspoon and Tom Hardy, but jeez louise... is there no one out there that likes the same weird shit I like and can simultaneously rock a fucking suit? Or how about just a guy that doesn't have a photo of himself wearing fucking Oakley sunglasses? Jesus H. Christ.
Am I going to die "fat and alone, and be found three weeks later half-eaten by Alsatiens (or pugs)"?
And if I am, can I just figure out how to be okay with that?
I don't know... it's been three days and I'm feeling totes discouraged.
Also, I'm still living at home right now, and I feel like any quality dude is going to find that weird. I'm moving back out on my own in the spring, but in the mean time I feel weird about having to address all of the debbie downer reasons I moved back home in the first place. Thoughts?
|Help me, I'm poor in social skills.|