March 19, 2012

Tiger Lady

Well, I'm in the midst of period hell today.

Yes, my period.  We're talking about it.

I refuse to call it "shark week" or "my visit with Aunt Flo" or any other cutesy-wutesy nickname we as women have come up with to make it seem slightly less awful than it actually is.

Also, you should know that I get really fired up and feminist-y when I have my period because it fucking pisses me off that we have to do this every month.  HATE IT.

Which is why I think every one should read this open letter from Kelly Oxford.



It’s only recently occurred to me that this entire ordeal of menstruation has been SEVERELY downplayed and we are feeding into it.
Last night my husband asked, “Why are you being such a bitch?”
He knows I am having my period. Why is he asking?
I came up with an answer, it’s because men and women keep this shit out of mind. I’m tired of it.
Bleeding for a week every month was probably downplayed to “period” by the same guy who says that a female “rape fantasy” means you are the victim.

If I told a guy that I had been bleeding for 3 days, he would not ask me why I was in a bad mood. If I then followed up by informing him that I actually can bleed for 7-9 days every month and survive he might even view me as some sort of hero.

Ladies, the world isn’t going to change until tampon commercials use red dye, instead of blue, to demonstrate absorbency.

Let’s think about this: Women are discreet about their periods - even with one another.
I want to say “OWN IT” when I see a woman shielding a tampon in her palm, or covering the bag of pads in her cart with a bag of marshmallows.
Because it is okay.
Not only is it okay, it’s your goddamn right to talk about it and hold it over the heads of every man you know. Not literally, of course.

Can you imagine the kind of shit we’d see if it were men having periods?
Commercials with warriors patting themselves on the backs for another month surviving the great “bleed”.
It wouldn’t be called a “period” as in, the “period” of time men don’t have as much fun doing fucky times with you….
Men would openly pass out absorbent socks for their wangs and smoke cigarettes while women looked on in disbelief and offer them more cigarettes for having lived through another week of blood.

But us? Well, it’s just too gross to think about. Women having their periods has been ingrained in our minds as THE MOST disgusting repetitive human event next to shit.
Here is why.
It’s to keep us from benefiting from it.
So I say, flaunt those tampons ladies, remind your partner when you are bleeding that you-are-indeed-bleeding, and when he gets grossed out it would be a good time to also bring up that whole rape fantasy thing too.
Your friend,

So, you know what?  We are women and we are bad asses, and we need to start bragging about that like ALL OF THE TIME.  Men brag about every minor horseshit thing they've ever sort of accomplished, why shouldn't we?


  1. *Fist in the air raised high* WOMAN POWER!

  2. I wrote about buying pads and that got a big fat zero. But at least I talked about it.

    WOMAN POWER! I just got over mine and I feel like a totally different person. It really does transform you, and not in a good and sexy way either.


Popular Posts